Repository path: workshop/translations/maqamat-sanaa/R48D-v1/translation.md · rendered 2026-09-09

«المقامة الصنعانية» — R48D v1: the same rendering with the sound taken out

This is not a translation policy and is not offered as one. It is an instrument-built control text (../../regimes/R49-dechime.md): T-maqamat-sanaa-R48-v1 with the colon-end word of exactly one colon changed at each graded chime, and nothing else changed anywhere. It exists so that a study contrasting the rhymed rendering with a plain one is contrasting the chime and the diction the chime forced, rather than two independently written translations by the same hand.

Built by the lead agent, in session, at $0 — not ledgered. The verse is carried over unchanged and is excluded from every study segment.

What was done, mechanically

65 cola changed of 139. tools/rhyme_pairs.py on the adjacent colon-end pairs:

Not one of R48-v1\'s chiming adjacent pairs survives here. Four further substitutions were made on the pre-run critic\'s finding (../../experiments/E-20260825b-flippancy/critic-response.md, C__P2 finding 5, which named a residual suffix chime by ear that the tool had graded UNKNOWN): p024 keening → lament, p026 admonishing → sermon, p037 follies → idle tales, p062 provision → readiness. The three NEAR pairs that remain — wailing ⁄ throng, acquisition ⁄ ruin, forgot ⁄ comfort — are the tool\'s wide N1/N2 grades on pairs that do not chime by ear, and they are at loci R48-v1 does not chime at either.

The limit this page exists to declare

R49 rule 4 fired, hard. Of the 65 substitutions, 41 make the colon a closer rendering of the Arabic than R48-v1\'s, 19 are level, and 5 make it looser. The direction matters and is registered before any judgement was collected: the control is, on the hand\'s own reading, the more faithful text.

So a finding that the rhymed arm reads worse — lighter, less graceful, more mannered — is consistent with the rhyme doing it and equally consistent with the slight looseness the rhyme cost. And the pre-run critic\'s C__P1 finding 2 sharpens this in the other direction, correctly: a null is not clean either, because the chime and the reduced exactness could push the same item in opposite directions and cancel. Both readings are written into the study\'s frozen design §4 and into what its result page may not say.

The 5 looser ones are named: p080 and p086, where de-chiming destroys the two total puns («تستهديه ⁄ تستهديه», «الصدقات ⁄ الصدقات») that both R43 and R48 answered by repetition; p097 spittle → spouting; p107 praise → thanks; p127 at me → in my face.

The substitution table

The text

The narrator comes to Ṣan'ā

p001. Al-Ḥārith ibn Hammām related: When I had mounted the withers of expatriation, and want had set me far from my age-mates, the buffetings of Time flung me — p002. to Ṣan'ā of the Yemen. p003. I entered it with my wallet spent, p004. my penury plain, p005. owning not a mite, p006. nor finding in my scrip a morsel. p007. So I fell to beating her streets like one distraught, p008. and to ranging her quarters with the ranging of the thirsty bird hovering; p009. and I scouted the pasture-grounds of my glances, p010. and the walking-grounds of my morning and evening straying, p011. for a generous man before whom I might wear threadbare my face, p012. and to whom I might open my need, p013. or a man of letters whose sight would lift my heaviness, p014. and whose recital would slake my thirst — p015. until the end of my perambulation, p016. and the first of God's kindnesses, p017. brought me to a broad meeting-ground, p018. holding a press of people and a wailing. p019. So I pushed into the thicket of the throng, p020. to sound out what was drawing the tears; p021. and I saw, at the hub of the ring, p022. a body that was of slight frame, p023. on him the gear of the trail, p024. and in him the note of the lament. p025. He was stamping out rhyme-pairs with the jewels of his saying, p026. and striking the ears with the rebukes of his sermon; p027. and mixed bands had ringed him round, p028. as the halo rings the moon, p029. and the sheath the fruit. p030. So I edged in to catch a light from his store, p031. and to gather some pearls of his wisdom; p032. and I heard him say, when he had entered his field, p033. and the camel-throats of his improvising had roared:

The sermon

p034. O you that go blind in your overweening, p035. trailing the robe of your vanity, p036. bolting headlong into your ignorances, p037. sidling away toward your idle tales: p038. how long will you hold to your waywardness, p039. and find sweet the pasture of your wrongdoing? p040. And till when will you go to the end of your display, p041. and not come to the end of your sport? p042. You go out duelling in your rebelling, p043. against Him in whose hand your forelock is held! p044. You make bold, with the foulness of your conversation, p045. against Him that knows your inmost secret! p046. You put yourself out of the sight of the one who is near, p047. and you stand in the eye of your Watcher! p048. You hide from the slave that you own, and no secret is secret from your Sovereign! p049. Do you think there is profit for you in your estate, p050. when the hour comes for you to depart? p051. Or ransom for you in your acquisition, p052. when your own deeds work your ruin? p053. Or your remorse of any use, p054. when your footing slips? p055. Or a tenderness for you in your kin, p056. on the day the Muster gathers you? p057. Why have you not struck into the road of your right way, p058. nor hurried the cure of your malady, p059. nor blunted the point of your violence, p060. nor held your soul — the greatest of your enemies — in check? p061. Is not death your assignation? p062. Then where is your readiness? p063. Is not the grey hair the warning you see? p064. Then what is your excuse? p065. Is not the grave-niche your bed? p066. Then what will you say? p067. Is not God your journey's end? p068. Then who is your helper? p069. How often has Time waked you, and you drowsed, p070. and preaching has pulled at you, and you would not stir! p071. And the lessons were made plain to you, and you turned a blind eye, p072. and the truth stood out for you, and you wrangled, p073. and death put you in mind, and you forgot, p074. and it lay in your hand to comfort, and you gave no comfort! p075. You prefer a coin you can stow, p076. to a remembrance you can heed; p077. and you choose a palace you would build high, p078. over a kindness you would bestow; p079. and you turn from a guide you would ask of, p080. to a store you would beg from; p081. and you let the love of a garment you desire p082. outweigh a guerdon you might purchase. p083. The rubies of donation p084. cleave closer to your heart than the hours of prayer; p085. and outbidding in bride-gifts p086. is dearer to you than keeping up alms; p087. and the bowls of your provisions p088. are more to your appetite than the scrolls of the faiths; p089. and joking with your comrades p090. is better company to you than the reciting of the Qur'ān! p091. You enjoin what is right and break its bound, p092. and you fence men from what is wrong and do not fence yourself; p093. and you edge away from wrong and then walk full into it, p094. and you fear men, when God is worthier of your fear! p095. Then he recited:

b001. Perdition to the seeker of this world, / who has poured toward her his whole inclination; b002. he never comes to his senses, for love of her / and the surfeit of his passion; b003. yet had he known it, there had been enough for him, / of all he covets, a ration.

He goes, and is followed

p096. Then he let his dust settle, p097. and dried up his spouting, p098. and took his water-skin on his arm, p099. and put his cudgel under his arm-pit. p100. And when the company had turned their eyes to his brace, p101. and seen him ready to leave his station, p102. every man of them put his hand into his pocket, p103. and filled him from his bounty a pailful, p104. and said: Lay this out on your keep, p105. or divide it among your company. p106. So he took it from them with lowered gaze, p107. and turned from them with a tongue in thanks; p108. and he fell to taking leave of all who escorted him, p109. that his road might be hidden, p110. and eluding whoever came on behind, p111. so that his quarters none should know. p112. Al-Ḥārith ibn Hammām said: So I followed him, hiding from him my eye, p113. and came after his track from where he could not see, p114. until he came to a hollow, p115. and slid into it, heedless of any behind him. p116. So I let him be till he had drawn off his shoe, p117. and washed his feet; p118. and then I broke in on him. p119. And I found him closeted with a disciple, the two of them at meat, p120. over bread of fine flour, p121. and a kid roasted in the pit, p122. and, over against the pair of them, a jar of wine. p123. So I said to him: Sir, is that your report, p124. and this your truth? p125. He fetched up a sigh of the dog-day's fire, p126. and all but split with rage, p127. and he kept goggling in my face, p128. till I feared he would spring upon me. p129. And when his blaze had sunk low, p130. and his scorching was hidden away, p131. he recited:

b004. I put on the fine mantle to come at the sweetmeat, / and I hooked my hook into every worthless date; b005. and I made my preaching a snare, / and hunted with it the quarry and the quarry's mate; b006. and Time so drove me that I came in, / by the deftness of my wiles, on the lion in his lair; b007. for all that, I never feared its turning, / nor did a sinew of mine quiver there; b008. nor did a covetous soul bring me down / to a watering-place that would soil my name; b009. and had Time dealt justly in its judging, / it had never given rule to men of blame.

p132. Then he said to me: Come near and dine; p133. or, if you would rather, stand up and speak. p134. So I turned to his disciple and said, I charge you by Him through whom harm is undone, p135. tell me who this is. p136. He said: This is Abū Zayd of Sarūj, the lamp of them that wander, p137. and the crown of men of letters. p138. So I went back by the road that had brought me, p139. and wondered my fill at the sight I had seen.